In god's hands
by Ragata
Summary: Jack and Kate has been together for about three months, when they both feel like their attraction for each other is slowly fading away.
1. Chapter 1

_**Title: **In god's hands  
**Author**: Rebecka Larsson  
**Rating:** K  
**Classification:** Lost; angst; Jack/Kate  
**Spoilers:** No spoilers, hopefully  
**Disclaimer:** "Lost" do not belong to me. It all belongs to JJ Abrams, the creators and producers of Lost. Don't sue.  
**Written**: 09 April, 07 – 0 April, 07_  
**Summary:** Jack and Kate has been together for about three months, when they both feel like their attraction for each other is slowly fading away.

**_A/N:_**_I used the song 'In God's Hands,' by Nelly Furtado, as an inspiration for the story, so why don't you listen to that song, while reading it. Please review ___

**Kate's POV.**

What bothered her the most wasn't the fact that he checked Juliet out. It was the fact that he looked at her the exact same way he looked at Kate a while back, before they finally threw in the towel and revealed their love for one another. He looked at her as though he wanted to be with her, and it didn't even seem like just lust, which would've been okay. It almost seemed like he had feelings for her, stronger feelings than lust and friendship.

Kate couldn't let her steal him from her, right? She needed him, and she needed him to need her. Had she done something wrong, or maybe she hadn't been there for him the way she used to. But could he really blame her? Sawyer was probably Kate's best friend on this island, and he died. He couldn't expect Kate to be all cheery and loving all the time. She needed time to mourn her friend.

And if he couldn't handle being without her, without running to Juliet, maybe he wasn't the guy she thought. Oh, god, Kate couldn't believe she was thinking those words. She needed to have more faith in him. It wasn't like he had cheated on her. No, he was completely faithful and she shouldn't doubt him. But he looked at her with such a hunger, Kate couldn't help but wanting to be in her shoes. She wanted him to look at her that way again... at least that was what she believed and wanted to be true.

But the more Kate thought about it, she found it that he didn't make her feel the way he used to. Maybe she didn't want to be the girl he watched and gave all his attention to. Maybe she didn't feel the same way for Jack anymore.

_I looked at your face I saw that all the love had died  
I saw that we had forgotten to take the time  
I saw that you couldn't care less about what you do_  
_Couldn't care less about the lies_  
_You couldn't find the time to cry_

**Jack's POV.**

Juliet was so beautiful, and her golden locks shimmered as the sun went down behind the horizon. Her voice had never cracked one time during the time they had known each other, and Jack loved the confidence she spread. He sometimes thought about what it would be like to spend a night with her, or maybe even have a relationship with her. They had so much in common, and they did feel _something_ for each other. But Jack was with Kate.

He loved Kate, and he had never before doubted that they were meant to be. But after Sawyer died, Kate never became the same again. Jack knew he shouldn't blame her for that, because they were so good friends, and maybe more than so. They did sleep together once. Jack could still feel the rage and mistrust in Kate when he thought about that moment. He remembered that when he saw that, he really gave up everything that had to do with having a relationship with her.

But Jack loved her. He saw beyond her faults and past mistakes. And he knew that it was now that Kate needed him, more than ever. She lost her friend, and in a way, so did Jack. Yes, he had to admit that something in him was relieved when Sawyer passed on after being shot by Ben, because then Kate was his. He totally took advantage of the situation, and made drastic moves, and he won the girl. He didn't regret it, telling Kate how he felt about her, not at all.

But when he looked at it now, he saw that he made a mistake. He picked the wrong time. Yes, they had spent two amazing months together, but the last month she had drastically pulled away. She hadn't broken down over Sawyer's death until then, and Jack realized that it would've been much better if her breakdown happened right when the accident, but their love kept her going.

Jack turned and looked at Kate who, he saw now, was watching him and Juliet. He did think Kate was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, and she did top Juliet. But right now, it seemed like the amazing personality that Jack had fallen in love with was fading away. And maybe so was his love for her.

_We forgot about love  
We forgot about faith  
We forgot about trust  
We forgot about us_

_I hope you like it, and review and let me know if it's worth continuing. I have a little twist in mind, if I should continue, but I'm not sure about it. And I promise that if I do continue, there will be some talking as well ;) _


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, I couldn't help it. I had to write one more chapter. Hope you like it. This is NOT the end, though, so things may change.. But it's not sure.

**Jack's POV.**

Jack walked up to his beautiful girlfriend, and showed her a smile. She didn't seem able to smile back, though, so his face got blank as well. He noticed her eyes flicking between himself and Juliet. _Was she actually jealous_, he thought. It brought mistrust and lack of faith in their relationship, to him, but also a feeling of amusement. The feeling of Kate being jealous because of him, made him feel slightly aroused.

It had almost felt like she didn't care about him anymore, but if she was jealous, it was strongly showed that she _did _care. Maybe it wasn't too late to redo the couple. Or maybe it was. If she didn't even have enough trust in him to believe he wasn't faithful, then was it really possible to try over. _Shit_, Jack thought, _I can't possibly see it as our relationship's over, and we have to start over. That is so wrong._ He smiled at Kate again as he sat down next to her and took her hand.

"How are you?" he asked. Kate pulled away her hand, and refused to smile back at her boyfriend. Jack shook his head, and sighed. "Are you upset with me for some reason?" Kate shot a glance at him, which showed him her rage clearly.

"Are you serious?" Jack really couldn't understand what he had done wrong. She couldn't possibly be this angry over him talking to Juliet. They talked every single day, as _friends_. So what was her issue about it today? "It's like you don't even see me anymore, Jack! It's like you don't even care. All you do is run off to your dear Juliet." Jack was shocked to Kate's words. Her voice cracked several times, and he sensed her insecurity.

Why did Kate have to be so damn insecure? She should know that I was hers, and I didn't even want Juliet. But Jack wasn't a hundred percent sure about that anymore. He was sure he didn't want Juliet. He came around to see that just a couple of minutes ago. She was nothing compared to Kate. And even though that was how he felt, he wasn't sure that Kate was the one for him.

_Now our love's floating out the window_  
Our love's floating out the back door  
_Our love's floating up in the sky in heaven  
Where it began back in God's hands_

**Kate's POV.**

Kate wondered if it was pointless. If there wasn't any need to even try to sort things out between them. It was as she just had told him, he didn't care about her anymore. And she wasn't even sure she cared if he did or not, and that was the worst part of it all. She loved Jack, she really did. Kate highly doubted she would ever stop love him. Right now that seemed like completely impossible. He had picked her up, been her hero and she had been there for him. They had been there for each other, in every possible way you could think of.

"If you truly believe that, it's really heartbreaking," Jack said; quiet, almost as a whisper. _Oh, no_, Kate thought and pulled her hands through her hair. Was she wrong about everything? Maybe Jack didn't see Juliet as a love-interest, but just as a friend. Oh, whom was she kidding? This wasn't even about Juliet. This was about her and Jack, about their relationship, and if there even was a relationship anymore.

She looked up into Jack's eyes and saw the waves rise behind him in the ocean. "Kate, I love you," Jack said, gazing her eyes. "But if we don't trust each other anymore maybe that doesn't matter." _Was this really happening?_ Kate wondered, completely frantic. Was this the end for them? Was the best thing that ever happened to her coming to an end? She looked into Jack's eyes and saw a tear glitter.

In a moment all of their good and bad moments had flashed through her head, and she felt herself tearing up, missing what they once had. She hated them both, herself _and_ Jack, for giving up so easy. What they had was so great, and their love was so pure and so powerful. She would never have thought it would come to an end.  
"Maybe love wasn't enough," she whispered.

_We didn't respect it  
We went and neglected it  
We didn't deserve it  
But I never expected this_

Please review. I want comments!


	3. Chapter 3

Okay, one more chapter came up, and there is at least coming one more. For this chapter I used the song 'On our way' with Christina Aguilera as inspiration. R&R!

**Kate's POV.**

Kate had still a hard time understanding that she and Jack were over, even two weeks later. They had hardly talked during this entire time. It was such a strange feeling, considering they had been there for each other and talked about everything ever since the plane crashed. She smiled as she remembered the very first time they spoke to each other, and how much she liked him instantly. How attractive he was, and the way he made her feel, so easy.

Kate did feel very strongly that it had been her fault that their relationship ended. She could not stop blaming herself. Obviously Jack didn't want to be with Juliet, so she couldn't understand why she had been so damn jealous. _Now that we're not together anymore,_ _Jack could easily have jumped Juliet, how non-romantic that sounded_, Kate thought, while rolling her eyes, _but he hasn't. _She sometimes hoped that she hadn't confronted him like that, and maybe they would have worked it out, somehow.

Jack's muscles took Kate's breath away as she watched him shop woods for the fire they wanted for the evening. She wanted to hold him again, and tell him how much she loved him. She wanted to be near him and just talk to him, just like they used to. Couldn't they at least be friends after this? She prayed for that to happen. If she couldn't have him as his own, couldn't they at least be friends. Right now, that was all she needed, but she secretly wanted more.

_Me and you, we're different  
Don't always see eye to eye  
You go left, and I go right  
And sometimes we even fight  
That don't mean that I won't need a friend  
You and me, we're in this 'til the end_

**Jack's POV.**

Whenever Jack looked back at his life before the crash, he couldn't find a time where he was happier than what he was when he was with Kate. Not even Sarah had made him feel so good about himself, and he had definitely loved her, so he even married her. He highly doubted, if they escaped this island life, that he would find someone better for him or someone he could love more, than Kate. She _was_ the love of his life, and he knew that.

So how come the perfect couple didn't last, Jack asked himself. Had Kate been right? Wasn't love enough? And since the love was there, what was it that had destroyed it for them, lack of trust? Could it be so easy and stupid? Had he and Kate really blown everything away because of such a silly thing? Trust was something that could be re-established. Not everyone believed in that, but Jack certainly did.

He stopped shopping the wood for a second and dried away some sweat off his forehead. He pulled off his shirt and threw it in the sand behind him. As he turned he noticed Kate two hundred feet away, watching him. She quickly turned her eyes away but Jack didn't. He just stood there, with the axe in his hand, watching her beautiful features. When she realized he was watching her, she shot him a shy smile, and he replied it with a huge grin.

_God, she looks amazing,_ Jack thought, and without thinking about it, he found himself walking in her direction. He simply couldn't resist being away from her anymore. He had to be near her, talk to her, anything. Her brown hair reflected her tanned skin and her eyes sparkled as she smiled broadly. _Maybe I'm not the only one who's missed us_, Jack thought and sat down next to her.

_I think we're on our way  
Through all the lows and highs  
I need you by my side  
I think we're on our way  
To better days_

Please Review on what you think about it!


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